the beginning of my grief I felt so lost and bewildered as Alice in Wonderland. I looked out the window and I felt foreign in my own city. Nothing was going with me. Was disconnected from life. The daily life of others seemed strange was time unable to keep small talk. I could not follow social conventions. Exit to the street required a similar effort to climb Everest. At any time, unpredictably, could explode within me a devastating storm. No one felt a deep pain, he feared going mad. Friends, people who love you, if they have not gone through a great duel, not know how to hold you. It is with time and gradually learns that listening to your heart to select the outputs, to say no at the last moment, to have patience with it when the eyes open twisted senses one day ... There is no instructions, because every match is different, but it seems to me that at first, recollection and silence help. If no power, it is best to be quiet, trying to create loving thoughts to help us to recharge our batteries.
Two years Ignasi died, my mother died one night in August, suddenly, as James, Lluis and I were in Cape Verde, seeking infect the pure joy that can be felt in Africa. That night I awake without knowing why. At dawn, when I called my sister went back to the dark cave, without time to time, to disconnect, the silence ... but I was scared, Ignasi's death has taught me that grief is to go through it, I knew I had to go what I went through, that the death of a loved one changes our lives forever, but we resist. After the departure of Ignasi see death as a new beginning, not an end.
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